But it was really hard to enjoy myself because Rodrick would start hovering over me when I still had fifteen minutes left on my shift.
We each got three half-hour shifts a night, but Rodrick would cheat Manny. out of HIS turn by taking the blanket into the bathroom right before Manny's shift was supposed to START. Then Rodrick would sit in there for an HOUR, which cut into MY shift.
So Mom made a rule that we can't take blanket into the bathroom,
One night I stept with the blanket my room, and Rodrick complained because he wanted to use it while he ate breakfast. Mom made a NEW rule that said if you slept with the blanket it had to be returned downstairs by 8:00 a.m.
By the end of the first week, there were so many rules that Mom had to put them all in a MANUAL, which ended up being like twenty-five pages long.
But THAT didn't solve our problems, and eventually Mom took the blanket away to give it to someone who “deserved” it. She said it was our fault we couldn't have something nice because we didn't know how to SHARE.
Grown-ups are always talking about how great sharing is, but personally I think it's overrated. And if I ever get enough money I'm gonna build a big castle all for myself, and there's gonna be a big heavy blanket in every room
Monday
When I woke up this morning, it was below
freezing outside. I was relieved it actually felt like
WINTER again, but when Mom told me I had to
wear thermal underwear to school I thought maybe
global warming isn’t such a bad thing after all.
I HATE wearing thermal underwear because it's uncomfortable and I feel RIDICULOUS wearing it. Thermal underwear looks cool when it’s on the mannequin at the mall, but when I put it on I just look like a retired superhero.
The mannequins at the mall are always super buff, and they make guys like me who can't spend three hours in the gym every day look bad.
If I ever get in really good shape, I'm gonna sign up to be a mannequin model. Because that would be an awesome thing to brag about on a date.
The mannequins you see at the sports store are, always in athletic poses, and it looks like it would be HARD to stay in that position while someone sculpts you. And that's just too much effort for a job that should be EASY.
So when I apply for the job I'm gonna do it at the bed store.
Mom says I'm LUCKY to have thermal underwear, because our ANCESTORS didn’t have this kind of stuff to keep them warm.
Sometimes I WONDER about my ancestors, though. I have no idea why they chose to live HERE when they could've picked somewhere a whole lot WARMER.